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The Elephant in the Room

22 Mar

I need to get this off my chest.

My pregnancy: I hated it. It was one of the worst times in my life. I was miserable, sick, I ended up almost dying because of a stupid tornado, my labor was horrid, and the first week postpartum felt like hell.

I’m dedicating today as a confessional. If you are a family member or friend that may be easily offended I’d recommend not reading.

Confession #1 – I dreaded having a boy when I found out the gender. I just knew Bouncy Buns was going to be Emma. I was carrying high, his heartbeat was fast, and friends just knew it was going to be a girl. I hoped to be apart of Team Pink. I wanted to go shopping together, play dress up, collect dolls, and cover our home with pink & glitter. Well.. we know how that went. I spent a month after I found out the gender crying. When I saw little boys I thought of “misbehaving”, “attitudes” and only wanting to play video games & watch TV. It doesn’t help when The Pickle can come over he’s a very reserved little guy – he likes to keep to himself & only play video games (which there’s nothing wrong with him being reserved. At the time my emotions were out of control). Even to this day I feel awkward around The Pickle because he’s a boy. What do I do with a boy who’s already set on what he wants to do and doesn’t want to hear from some woman who’s entered his father’s life? My dreams of having someone I could relate to faded away. As the months went on I finally accepted that my dreams of a girl would have to be reserved for next time. When I look back now I realized my feelings were natural. My son means the world to me.  He is so much fun. I can’t wait until he gets older. I might not be able to do the dress up or go shopping together but I’m going to try to do lots of arts & crafts with him.

Confession #2 – I was upset people who said they were going to visit me didn’t. I get it now that life happens, but it really hurt me at the time. When we ended up finally getting our own place again after the tornado I had so many friends who said they would visit me. Out of all of them I only had two people do so. Only two. Only one person outside of my parents visited me after Wiggle Man was born. Just one. Let me be frank: My viewers and friends online have seen more of my son than people I know close. Oh well. I hope I can make local friends soon or even better maybe the ones who I care for my visit. It’s just a thought.

Confession #3 –  I’m really irritated at the people who told me I was going to get gestational diabetes. I had multiple people in my life tell me I was “destined” to have gestational diabetes because of my size. I won’t deny that I’m a plus size girl. I want to be healthier but I appreciate my curves. Not every plus size girl develops gestational diabetes, and not every “skinny” girl doesn’t have to worry about getting it. Gestational diabetes happens because your baby’s placenta is making your pancreas overwork. It doesn’t mean your diabetic. For the record the people who told me I was going to get it: Yeah, you’re right I DID get it. But guess what? I’m a lot healthier now than what I was before I was pregnant. I consider gestational diabetes as a blessing as much as I hated having it.

Confession #4 – I regret not being able to breastfeed. This regret is only because of personal choice not because I think one is better than another. Nothing went right with my pregnancy. I had complication after complication.  All that I asked to go right was for me to be able to breastfeed. Did that get to happen? No. The odds were against me. There are people in my life who told me I wouldn’t be able to do it. I even had a nurse while I had my stay in the hospital tell me it’s going to be too difficult for me to be able to breastfeed because I have large breasts. I asked for a lactation consult to help me, and I was ignored. The icing on the cake of it all: My son was taken away from me during one night of my hospital stay and fed formula by the nurses without my permission. The answer I got back when I complained: He was getting formula when using the nipple shield anyways. That wasn’t the point. I wanted to have that bond with him. It was all downhill from there when I ended up with an epidural headache. I could not lift my head up without being in excruciating pain which left me not being able to pump, or breastfeed. I get my son is healthy and happy on formula.  My biggest let down from the entire situation is I felt like I gave up. I’m disappointed in myself. I never had maternity photos,  newborn photos, a nursery for him, or even a baby shower. I at least wanted to give him nutrition from what my breasts were meant to do. I don’t cry myself to sleep anymore because of not being able to breastfeed which is good.  I understand it’s the past now. My son is a happy healthy chunky baby.

Confession #5 – I hate being considered one of those moms who need medicine to function. I was forced to go and get help by my family. I was so overwhelmed with being a mother, and the aftermath of everything going wrong I was trying to find a way out. Nothing went right, I wasn’t getting any sleep and I felt so inadequate as a mother. If I didn’t have the support I did I probably would have died.  The Wellbutrin is helping me be able to focus again.  I can look back at what I was doing and realize it wasn’t right. I only hope one day I can be weaned off of anti-depressants.  I don’t like having to need help feeling better. Why can’t I do it on my own?

Confession #6 – I should have never let myself be talked into getting an epidural. Again, this is a personal choice. I stand neutral between those who are for and those who are against them.  I was in labor for 21-22 hours before I finally gave in and had an epidural. Did I mention my labor included pitocin and magnesium sulfate? My original plan was to have an IV of pain killers. My OB, my husband, and a nurse told me it was silly to not have an epidural because I was afraid of side effects. They all said I would feel better. It took multiple attempts to get the epidural in. One of those times a blood vessel was hit. Another time they hit nerves that hit my legs. The epidural may have made my labor progress rather quickly but if I knew what I was going to go through I wouldn’t do it.

I’ve been holding those confessions back for a very long time. I really hope I’m not alone in thinking some of the things I do. If I am, however, I won’t be hurt.  If anyone relates or felt like they had a horrible pregnancy I’d love for you to take the time & reply.

Now on a different note – I reached 100 views for Wednesday & 200 Twitter followers yesterday!  Hurray! Thank you everyone for reading my blog. I am in the works in getting product reviews & giveaways started (in other words I’m contacting companies in hopes they won’t think I’m crazy for wanting to review their products because I have a small viewer base at the moment). If anyone had some suggestions of some companies they would love for me to review let me know.

 

We have a hostage situation, folks.

18 Mar

Bouncy Buns was very clingy today.

In fact, he was SO clingy he demanded to be coddled. Any time he was set down he’d cry. When I made any attempt to talk with him instead of the smiles & coos I usually get I was treated to dirty looks & raised eyebrows.  He also decided he wanted to eat every hour.

My name is Desiree and I survived being held hostage by an 11 week old baby from 9:00AM until 5:00PM.  It’s 8:00PM and he finally fell asleep about an hour ago. THANK GOODNESS. It is days like these where I usually end up crying my eyes out because I can’t comfort him. Thanks to the Wellbutrin, however, I can handle the situation a little bit better. You should have seen me before the Wellbutrin. Before we figured out Bouncy Buns had reflux he would cry all day, shriek through every feeding, then proceed to throw up everywhere. He slept at 10 minute intervals. If we were lucky he would sleep 2 hours tops. I spent the majority of my days in tears, stressed, and seriously contemplating if I was really going to be a good mother. I felt very inadequate.

I still wonder about how I’m doing as a mother, but I take a lot more into consideration. For example: I didn’t die in the May 22nd tornado because I wanted to bring Bouncy Buns into the world. I fought to keep him alive when he shouldn’t have been but here he is.

I’m getting all teary eyed.  I can’t believe in a little over 2 months it will be the one year anniversary of the tornado. I really wish I had more time to heal from what really happened.  Tomorrow I have another battle with anxiety.

Tomorrow we have severe storms with tornado potential.  Just writing that last sentence makes me sick to my stomach. Since starting my PSTD therapy I’ve been dreaming of dying almost every night, and tornado dreams keep reoccurring. Those are the worst.  What makes tomorrow even more scarier for me is how I’m going to be alone for most of it. That’s right. Alone. Reavera happens to be working while it’s going to get bad. Lovely.

I can’t help but feel like a failure again.  I’m suppose to stay calm in situations for my son. How can I do that? Will I EVER be able to do that?

Maybe if I’m lucky my parents will come up and stay with me for a few hours or even better maybe the storms won’t reach severe limits.

When I was a little girl I always wanted to be a meteorologist. I don’t like to brag about this but I know quite a bit more about the weather than I should. I use to want to be a storm chaser. When it stormed I would go outside and watch it until it get severe…. then I would get nervous. Right before the May 22ndt tornado I was where I could really respect the mother nature.

Not anymore. I’m too afraid to. The weather holds me hostage.

I guess that’s why I’m in therapy, right guys?

Product Review: Birthday Cake Oreos

14 Mar

Hi all. I’m feeling a little bit better. It seems like the plague has hit my whole house. So far Bouncy Buns has not contracted what we got. I hope not. Reavera and I are MISERABLE. I felt good enough to go to my PSTD Therapy today. We are starting what my therapist calls “exposure” treatment. I’m suppose to write, not type, how the May 22nd EF5 tornado impacted me. We’ll see how that goes. Everyone around me is saying the Wellbutrin has completely changed me for the best. I do see an improvement in my mood and I’m able to cope with my son alone better. It still gets to me that I am one of those medicated moms. Society looks down on us for needing that type of help. Luckily I have a group of girls online that I consider my support network. I’m hoping to find more mother’s or father’s out there who are in the same boat as I am.

When I get the chance I need to take new video of Bouncy Buns. He’s starting to blow bubbles!  That may not seem much to some of you but to me that is amazing. He’s went from crying, pooping, sleeping, rinse, repeat to blowing bubbles, cooing, smiling, pooping, sleeping, rinse, repeat.

Anyways ONTO the Product Review. I realize that since I’m new to the Mommy Blog world no one is going to come up to me and ask me to review their product. I have major interest in doing that on my blog so I figured why not review some of the stuff I have in my house? What better way to kick things off with the Birthday Cake Oreos!

Birthday Cake Oreo Packaging.

Birthday Cake Oreos. Limited Edition

The Birthday Cake Oreo is a limited edition cookie that celebrates Oreo’s 100th birthday. I need to make a confession. When I saw these in my local grocery store I was kind of perplexed. How could a birthday cake flavor mix with the chocolate flavor of the Oreo? When I went back to the store the next day they were all gone. All over my Facebook feed were friends clamoring over delicious these cookies were. I made it a mission to find them. Were these cookies really that good? Two weeks later they were back in my local grocery stores. I almost have given up hope. Victory is mine!

There's a surprise on the back..

When you look at the Birthday Cake Oreo it is your typical Oreo design which has been used since 1952. When you flip the cookie over there’s a surprise..

Happy Birthday Oreo!

If you’re unable to see the picture the other side of the Oreo has a single candle in the middle with the text “OREO 100”. I believe the design around the text is suppose to represent frosting design of a cake. It would have been nice to have the design on both sides from a design standpoint but I’m not complaining.

Front/Side/Back/Whatever you want to call it aside let’s talk about the most interesting part of these little bad boys. You know what I’m talking about: The mysterious birthday cake filling.

Can birthday cake and chocolate really mix?

This picture does not do it justice. If you’ve ever paid attention to the inside of an Oreo cookie the filling is fairly thick. That can make it difficult to pull apart for those of us who like to open the oreo, lick the filling, then eat the cookie. Most of the time they usually break. Not this cookie. I was able to pull it apart easily. The color of this filling is more of an off color white compared to the white filling of a regular Oreo. Now comes the test. What exactly does the filling taste like? Could Oreo really pull this off?

Look at all the color.

The aroma of the filling reminded me of a birthday cake covered in buttercream frosting. Questions, and prejudice aside I took a taste.

It was amazing. I think my tongue died and went to cookie heaven. 

It tastes exactly like a birthday cake. I was expecting the taste to be overwhelming but it was not. It was just the right amount of birthday cake goodness. I was also delighted to see the extra sprinkles when I licked. The filling was a lot more creamier than a regular Oreo. This Oreo was made for us who eat the filling first! I just know it. But what about eating the cookie whole. Can birthday cake and chocolate really go good together?

The mystery is solved.

The answer? Absolutely! The combination is perfect. It’s like it was always meant to be. It wasn’t overly sweet together. The chocolate was in complete harmony with the birthday cake filling.

So how did these cookies go over with my family? Unfortunately my stepson was sick so he couldn’ try them but my husband loved them. As my stepson is an Oreo fan as well I am very sure these will go over nicely with them. That is if they’re not gone again before I can get some more. My package of Birthday Cake Oreos only lasted a couple of days.

Be warned: They are that addicting.

It saddens me they are only limited edition. Maybe one day they will come out permanently. If Oreo could change one thing it would be to match the consistency of their filling in this flavor with their regular flavors. I enjoyed the creamier, softer consistency of the birthday cake filling. I hope there are other Oreo cookie eaters, like me, who agree.

I’ve learned my lesson: Don’t judge a cookie by it’s filling.

Want to check out more from Oreo? You can visit their Facebook page here and their website here.  You can follow them on Twitter at @Oreo

Spring has Sprung!

12 Mar

Ok Mother Nature, give up it’s spring. You know what that means? Spring cleaning, tank tops, Easter Bunnies, and well.. allergies for me. Bleh.  I can not wait until Reavera to have a couple days off of work this week so he can help me clean the house. I think there is something I am allergic to in here. I’ve been nothing but coughs, and sniffles today. I’m almost sure of it. Every time I go into the bathroom my tonsils get scratchy.

There’s another thing spring reminds me of and that is Severe Weather. I think I’ll take this time to explain my PSTD. I can’t remember most of what happened when the tornado hit. Before it [the tornado] hit Dillons my ears popped. I know I was on the ground. I know I looked up at Matthew and repeatedly told him I loved him. I know I screamed.  I can’t recall what it was like being underneath where it was. I remember being in water. I remember being cold. I remember telling myself I can’t die that day. I can’t tell you the names of the firefighters, or the man who had the flashlight who was checking on me. I remember Matthew telling me not to give up that he will make sure I get out. I remember the relief I felt after they pulled me out. As of today I can’t go into movie theatres if the movie beside what I’m watching is loud. The sound of a windy day, once pleasant, now scares me. I am sick to my stomach every time there is a thunderstorm. If it heavy in a store that also scares me too. I cry. I wail. Every time it storms I’m afraid that either myself, my husband, my son, or all three of us will die.

This is a pretty touchy subject for me. I feel like a failure of a mother in this aspect. I can’t protect my son now that he’s out of me. I did what I could during the tornado to make sure he didn’t die. Since I’ve started my therapy I’ve began to have nightmares of tornadoes again. I always wake up right when the tornado has picked me up. Talk about a great way to wake up. I’ve been on Wellbutrin for two weeks now. Since I’ve been on it I am noticing I am not checking Weather.gov/Facebook/koamtv.com/Twitter every hour like I have been. I use to love the weather. Any of my close friends who know me knew that I got to where I would go outside to check out the storms. Not anymore.

It will take time. Tornadoes don’t hit in the same place every time, and not every tornado warning is necessarily a tornado. I do pray that the EF5 Tornado I was in May 22nd is the only tornado I will be in.  To this day my friends say I am very strong. I don’t see it. Especially since I’m one of “those mothers” who need medication to function right now.

I guess I am one hot mess after all. I think I’ll post about my PPD within the next day or two. It ties in heavily with my PSTD. That should be a fun one to talk about.

Let’s talk about something more cheerful, shall we?

This is Bouncy Bun’s first spring. My goal is to take him out for a walk everyday when it is nice outside. I also want to make sure I get pictures of him with an Easter Bunny, and I want to get him a cute little outfit. I really wish we had the money available right now to get Easter pictures. Fuck. I wish we had the money available to get pictures period. Maybe someday. Oh and he totally needs a “Kiss Me I’m Irish” type of onesie. His mommy and daddy are European Mutts. That includes Irish somewhere!

Before I go for the day if you’re unaware Gerber issued a recall today in their formula. Thank you Modern Mom for posting this! You can check out the article here:
http://www.modernmom.com/recalls/good-start-gentle-baby-formula

One life to live.

8 Mar

Ever since I was a little girl I was afraid of dying. It’s always been apart of my life. Since the tornado, and my pregnancy complications this fear has gotten worse. I almost can’t cope with it anymore. Life seems so short to me now. It isn’t fair because at the age of 25 I shouldn’t be consumed with this, right?

I don’t want to die. I don’t want to not be on this earth anymore. Why, as humans, do we not know what happens after we die? Will we be able to watch over our children and family, or do we go to another place? Are we reincarnated into something else? It scares me, to the brink of an anxiety attack, knowing one day that I will not exist anymore. Will my son be ok with it? Will I be able to see to my son grow up?

Maybe this is my time to find religion or something to believe in..for my son’s sake.

It just isn’t fair. Life has taken away my feeling of truly being alive. When I was driving to a grocery store yesterday I saw the damage that was done from that storm a week or so ago. Out of nowhere I started to cry. A couple of days ago I saw my old apartment complex on the news. It was nothing but an empty lot. That made me cry as well.  I was at our local Dillons yesterday and for a moment I thought I was back in Joplin at the Dillons I use to go to. The Dillons that nearly killed me. The Dillons, although it nearly killed me, saved my life.  Then I realized I wasn’t in Joplin anymore… and I was saddened.

I guess this is what PSTD is all about.   I apologize for being a bit of a bummer tonight. This blog is purely intended to help me heal. I hope that writing this down I will eventually be able to cope. I hope one day I can show Leo what I did to better myself for him.

Crazy Lady

4 Mar

Oh blog of mine. We must really stop these early morning rendezvous. 

Before I go back to bed I wanted to tell you all a story. A story about a crazy lady. So crazy enough she got dirty looks from her neighbors and when trying to explain what the hell was exactly going on the neighbor ignores her and slams her door!

It all started out on a beautiful Saturday morning. Our protagonist was having a pretty good day. Well. If you consider getting peed on two times, handling the attitude of a six year old, and attempting to adjust to her beloved husband going back to work. Ahem. This lady decides she wants to have a large glass of iced coffee. Because y’know. Coffee is amazing (true story). She makes herself a glass of coffee. Famished from having to walk miles in her home earlier in the day because the newborn is also adjusting to daddy not being home.. she drinks it pretty fast. That shouldn’t be a problem, right? 

Oh but it is.

Our lady starts to feel a heavy sensation in her head. In order to not think about it she makes a b-line to her laptop. A couple minutes go by. The next thing which happens scares the poo out of not only herself, but the six year old, and the newborn. Our lady ends up screaming, and bolting out of her house. Over. and over. and over. 

I introduce to you the crazy lady formerly known as lady. Hoo-rah.

It’s 40 degrees outside and our protagonist is outside is pacing back and forward on the phone frantically trying to get a hold of someone to talk to.  Every time her pace slowed down she would end up feeling like she was choking. The crazy lady goes back into her home. You should have seen the look on the six year old’s face. The newborn who finally went asleep? He woke up. 

The crazy lady then kept feeling worse. LUCKILY her husband miraculously comes home. He goes back inside with the six year old and newborn. Then everything goes down between the neighbor and our crazy lady. She felt HORRIBLE she was like this. 

In order to combat what was going on our crazy lady drank 6 glasses of water, ate a granola bar, and munched on cereal all while pacing.

Things eventually calmed down THREE HOURS LATER.

Now you must be wondering. What exactly happened to our lady?

Apparently, unbeknownst to her, the medication to fight anxiety & depression she was prescribed earlier in the week can have a very adverse reaction with caffeine.  It would have been nice if our lady now known as the crazy lady was told this. Our lady is now horribly embarrassed, and quite honestly feels like a failure to her family. 

So today’s lesson kiddos: Don’t drink anything high in caffeine while on Wellbutrin. Seriously. It can possibly make you bat shit crazy, and have the WORST panic attacks ever. 

Ahh. I feel better now. I’m going back to bed. Can you believe it’s only the fourth day of March and birds are already outside chirping away at 6:00AM? 

Will I ever be the same again?

29 Feb
Last night was certainly interesting indeed.I’m going to apologize if any of this not coherent. I’m running on a lack of sleep. Coffee is imminent.

We had a round of severe weather coming towards where I live now. After the May 22nd Tornado I no longer felt safe there, and we relocated to a community about 35 miles away. Since the tornado any time there are storms I keep a tab open on TornadoVideos.Net , The National Weather Service, my local station’s interactive radar, and on Facebook. My husband and my family both think I shouldn’t worry so much. I will admit. It’s rather tiring. Maybe that’s why I’m in therapy for PSTD. Heh. Anyways. Things started to get bad, at least on radar. Luckily I have a wonderful next door neighbor who will let us use her basement. Right before the storm got close to our city I started to notice rotation. I had a completely meltdown, and then begged asked my husband if we can go to the neighbors. After calling my mom, and waiting a couple more minutes I was able to convince my husband to let us all go to the neighbors. We ran into her house, baby carrier and all. I managed to run into a tree which resulted in me losing my glasses.  When we got in the electricity flickered. It eventually went out. By the time I was able to get myself and Wiggleman down into the basement the sirens went off. I had a complete relapse of the panic I felt back in May. I had my Husband beside me, Wiggleman in my arms, and I was on the phone talking to my mom. We stayed down there until the tornado warning expired at 11:15PM. The sirens actually stopped 10 minutes before the warning expired but I was not going to take my chances.  I was so proud of Wiggleman. He slept the entire time. We ended up staying at the neighbors house until the a little after midnight, and then walked back to our duplex. Our power was off until around 1:00-2:00AM.  I eventually got myself to fall asleep around 4:00-5:00AM. Wiggleman decided he wanted to wake up at 7:00AM. I’m pretty tired today, but it’s all worth it because our home was not damaged. Some other parts of community were less fortunate.

 Matthew gave me relief from Wiggleman for me to make a quick run to the grocery store. I decided to go down and look at the damage. I wanted to see if there was anything I could to do help. Tons of trees snapped in half, uprooted, and structural damage.  For some reason I’m not phased by the damage. I guess it’s because of what I endured in May.

There’s just one thing that’s bothering me. It’s literally eating me alive today. Soo.. here we go..

Is it going to be like this every time a storm rolls through this year? Maybe it’s a combination of PSTD, Anxiety, and wanting to take care of my son…. but I don’t want to die. I don’t want my son to die. I don’t want any of us hurt. I hate feeling like every storm we have may be a life or death situation. I keep telling myself May22nd was a one time occurring.  As much as I appreciate Mother’s Nature’s fury I despise that we, as humans, are so vulnerable to the worst that can happen. Luckily there were no serious injuries or deaths in my area… however I read about a man elsewhere in last night’s tornado outbreak that was in serious condition. His house collapsed on him. I cried last night. I hope he isn’t dead.  My next therapy session should be interesting.

Last night was another reminder to appreciate each and every day I have on earth. Life is way too short. I only have one victory last night and that was I didn’t have a complete meltdown during the storm, or afterwards. I’m actually HAPPY. Only a couple hours of sleep and happy? Weeeeird. I wonder if it’s my Wellbutrin starting to kick in, or I am finally starting to find some peace.  I wish my Freya would start to be herself again. Since the May 22 Tornado she has really changed. Last night didn’t help. She wouldn’t come out of hiding for a couple of hours.

Anyways I’m off to find some coffee, and maybe make some dinner. I plan on making this tonight:

Have I ever mentioned I LOVE Pinterest? The recipe comes from the blog Just a Spoonful Of. 

You got to start somewhere right?

27 Feb


I can’t believe I got most of my blog up and ready for viewers to read a day after I got things set up!  This is a major feat for a new mother as I’ve learned.  I took that picture of my son today. He’s such a cutie. He’s a little bit over 8 weeks old, and boy is he a chunker! He’s already 12lbs 11oz at his first round of shots appointment. I love my little guy though. He’s starting to control his hands. I love watching him try to suck on his fist.  Just an FYI: Be prepared for me to reference to my son as Wiggle Man, Mr. McWiggles, Sir Wigglesalot, or just plain ol’ Leo.

It’s been a full week since I’ve started my son on his reflux medicine. His pediatrician put him on Nexium since Zantac made him very constipated. It is seriously like a different baby. Since he was born he’s had horrible issues with what we finally found out was reflux. During the day time he would be so happy but come night time Oh God. It was nothing but hours of shrieking, wailing, and vomiting. I spent many nights since Leo was born crying because I couldn’t comfort him. Now I can say that is finally getting better.

Since we’re talking about babies.. I saw this really cool bottle in the February 2012 issue of Baby Talk Magazine.



These bottles are made by B.box. Not only do these bottles look cool but from what I got from the product description you put the formula in the dispenser portion on the bottle so whenever you’re ready to make a bottle just fill it up with water, and press a button on the bottom of the bottle to dispense formula into the water. How neat is that? It definitely looks like it would be more hygienic way to make bottles. Don’t worry. It converts into a regular bottle. When I can get a chance I want to purchase want of these bottles. When I can I’ll let you guys know how much Wiggle Man and I like it!

Want to take a look at all  of B.Box’s products? Check out their website at: http://www.bbox.com.au/

So.. on a touchy subject: I start my treatment for depression & anxiety today. I am on Wellbutrin. I have finally accepted in my mind that I need help in order to function again. Especially since tornado season is just around the corner. As we speak we have a chance for storms tomorrow. Any time there is gusty wind, thunder, or the combination of those I get really stressed out. I use to never be like that. I hate it. I can’t go into a movie theatre anymore without the sounds bugging me.

I just want to feel like myself again. Ever since my son was born I feel like a failure. Especially since I wasn’t able to breastfeed like I wanted to. This medication, alongside with my therapy should help though. I hope at least. I’ll let you know how it goes ok?

I guess that’s it for tonight. I’m going to relax with my husband, and maybe waste whatever time I have on Pinterest. God I love that site.

Check me out there at: http://pinterest.com/geekfaery/

Speaking of which.. maybe I should start using my twitter account again soon. Hmm.